5 Ways To Be Proud of Yourself

As I transition from 'college student' to 'grown up teacher lady' I try not to use this blog as a personal outlet, but considering the title of this post I think it's appropriate to talk about the last week of my life.

I seem to have fallen into a pool of negativity quicksand. I don't feel happy or content with myself, or where my life is at right now. My anxiety seems to be following me like a dark cloud over my head, and depressed thoughts seem to be tapping me on the shoulder more often than not. I don't feel proud of my work at school or in other aspects of my life, and it's starting to make me feel really miserable. But I understand that wallowing in pity and self doubt wont actually make anything better. Honestly, it is probably just making things worse.

The point of my blog is to empower people to be better - to make people think about tough topics - and to give advice to those dealing with the same problems I have dealt/am dealing with. So I don't want to sit here and talk about all the bad things I've done or the bad things that happened this week, I just want to discuss how we can make things better when it seems like they've fallen apart.

Loving yourself and feeling proud are hard things, so don't be discouraged if you are at square one. It took me 21 years to finally feel comfortable with myself and truly love the person I am, and some days (or weeks)  are harder than others. No one is 100 percent happy with themselves, and if you are, please feel free to contact me with your full-proof guide on ways to be proud of yourself. Until then, here is a few pieces of advice I've picked up in my 21 year journey:

1// Make time for "you" during the day
Being an education major, a member of Delta Zeta, and the President of our CMLA on campus, my days are packed. I usually do not get a moment to myself until about 9 o'clock at night, and by then all I want to do is read my book of choice and eat jalapeƱo chips shamelessly in my bed. I've been in situations where those moments of alone time are taken away and it has effected me drastically. It's triggered emotional breakdowns, an overload of stress, and a pretty shitty attitude. It's 2014, I know we have 0976257563 things to do, but making time for you during the day is essential.

2// Don't be lazy
As a person with anxiety and spurts of depression, the ability to get out of bed in the morning comes and goes. When I get in these moods where I'm unhappy with myself, I do myself a disservice by coping via sleep and laziness. That just gives me more time to throw a pity party and play scenarios in my head over and over again. Can you imagine what that does to your mind? My motto that I've developed has helped me a lot (I also need to credit Beyonce because she inspired this motto) - Allow yourself 24 hours or less to feel sorry for yourself. Take this time to cry, be mad, sleep, punch a punching bag, or veg out while watching sad romantic movies. And when that time is up, get your shit together and kick ass. Get up, get motivated, and channel all that leftover energy into changing the situation and making things better. 

3// Embrace your personal style
Right now, I'm wearing a Blair Waldorf inspired dress and platform black booties. I look like I should be going out in Manhattan on a Friday night, but instead I am working on a blog post in a computer lab on my college campus. I've gotten a range of strange looks and compliments, but none of that matters because guess what - I feel fan-fuckin-tabulous. For those of you who have been in a Forever 21 before, you'll understand this reference - my sense of style is like a Forever 21 store times a billion. I literally wear different styles daily. Sometimes I'm decked out in sparkly dresses and high heel shoes, and other days I'm wrapped up in a comfy tee-shirt and leggings. I also own a "Fall Out Boy" hooded vest, and a snake skin dress. I used too  try and conform to what my campus society deemed as "appropriate" for class and social functions, but now I have realized that I feel 100 times better wearing what I love, rather than what is the norm on a college campus. 

4// Do a life detox
This is literally the most important thing, and the easiest to explain. If something/someone sucks the life out of you, leave it behind and do not look back. Run from it like the plague. Even if you lose everything and everyone, you will have a much cleaner, positive life, and there will be room for the better more positive things to come. 

5// Change the way you speak to yourself, and others.

One of the biggest problems I have had to overcome as an adult is choosing the words that come out of my mouth. I am notorious for bratty and rude comments. I'm not sure I will ever be charming or sweet by default, but I have my moments. It took me a long time to realize that the words pouring out of my mouth were a direct reflection on how I felt about myself. If I was shit talking another girl, that only showed my personality and lack of self esteem. If I was rude to a stranger it showed how bratty and upset I was, and had nothing to do with them. Changing your vocabulary and working hard to speak positively is important for self worth, and if you don't believe me try speaking poorly to yourself (you freakin suck self!) and see how negatively that effects you. Do not let the world make you a bitter or hard person. Speak confidently, sweetly, and proudly. Our voice and interactions with one another are so significant, we might as well speak positively.